Is Commitment a thing of the past?

I enjoy reading a blog called Satisfying Retirement, it is written quite well and it has a lot of great information, not just about retirement but also offering a great point of view of the world from a retiree’s perspective. The blog is both honest and candid about a lot of topics.

One of the articles that I enjoyed reading quite a bit was about commitment. With the economy the way it is looking, not just in the US but globally, it really makes you want to look for causes. I don’t want to look for someone or something to blame, but more of what behaviors can really affect the overall way we live.

I found that one of the biggest culprits is the lack of commitment in everything from relationships to people doing what they say they are going to do.

It was eye opening the first time I found out that there are people that will tell you that they will do something just so that they can get you off their back. Even though the have no intention of doing what it is that you are asking or suggesting, they just agree. The funny thing is that this culture is a lot more strict about communication in this sense. For example, in India, a yes means, I will try and you hardly ever hear a no to reply to a request. In this society, when you say yes it means I will do it. At least I thought it was supposed to.

Is this a value that has been eroded? Is bending the rules also part of the general consensus?

Follow my train of thought for a minute or two. The moment that the individual thinks of a commitment as something that can be broken, it is the moment that a system fails. Systems function based on rules. When you say something you are supposed to mean it, if not, then there is no accountability.

The post in Satisfying Retirement was more about how inconvenient it can be when business and people don’t respect a schedule, but this same thing permeates everything that we do. I have watched some documentaries about the economy recently and they all seem to have the common theme of not rule breaking, but lets see how much we can bend the rules. Eventually the rules just don’t apply and it turns into, lets see how much we can get away with.

I have also had interactions with people that love to see how far they can push others. They find it interesting to find others breaking points. To me this behaviors shows a lack of respect and it affects everything else in life. How about you, do you trust people’s word anymore? is that someone you value?

5 comments on “Is Commitment a thing of the past?

  1. A bit off topic, but a few years ago when my brother was about to become a parent for the first time, he asked my advice on raising a child. I told him one of the most important things in dealing with your kids, IMO, is to “say what you mean, mean what you say, and do what you say you’re going to do.”

  2. I think that is right on point, because it is where it starts. To much of “do as I say, not as I do” is not a good thing.

  3. I take “trusting someone’s word” on a person-by-person basis. With most people, I appreciate their willingness to help, but usually end up flaking, so I’ve come to expect that they won’t follow through. I know of a bunch of people, though, who i know I can count on. For some it’s because they’re suckers and can’t say no to anybody, or because they’re folks who are quite honest and will literally tell me “I’m going to say no because I don’t want to. If you REALLY get in a bind, then call me.” I appreciate the brutal honest because at least then I know and I can’t blame them. I’d rather someone tell me no then to say yes and either make it obvious they don’t WANT to help or make me feel like I owe them just out of obligation.

    I’m also a cynical bastard, though, so I usually expect the worst.

  4. I think in a way this has always been true, it’s just that we depend on so many more people now. And those people also have many more people depending on them. It’s more likely for things to “come up” and prevent someone from fulfilling their commitment. It’s also less likely for you to know before hand if the person is a flake. At least this is my opinion. I don’t have any professional research or anything to back it up.

  5. This is all about conversations and thoughts, I wish I had the time to research half of the things I think are facts, lol

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