Death is one of the only certain things in life. I think eventually we might find a way to slow down time or even travel through it, that would be kind of cool… scary, but cool. Maybe it is having lost a couple of people recently, maybe it is the knowledge that I have just started to have to deal with death close to me and it overall just sucks, but is a reality.
Time is flying by it seems and I am not ready to lose those close to me. The thought scares me and even though I do seem to be able to function after it, I know the in the coming years I will have no grandparents left (I know a lot of people have already begun to lose parents or never even met their grandparents.) Still the whole death thing start to hit closer and closer.
I am not affraid of my own death. Maybe it is the whole dare devil, adrenaline junkie thing… maybe it is that I don’t fear the afterlife… not sure.
Death does bring clarity about life. The closer it gets, the more I realize that we need to really enjoy our life to the fullest. The more I read, the more I realize that those around us are the ones that truly shape our world view. My life continues to get better and better the more I surround myself with people that are not just happy, but willing to enjoy life.
This decade I lost my Grandfather, more recently I lost a very close Great Aunt. I also lost 3 friends and 3 other close friends lost parents. It is interesting to me that this is what comes to mind when I think of this decade. I guess this decade started to really educate me about loss.
I have never been a super fan of holidays and the whole present thing, and now that I know that people have lost loved ones around this time I even start to think of it differently. I think of the people that have to spend their holidays in a hospital taking care of a sick loved one, more than getting presents for people. I care more about the thought of loneliness that some people feel in their later years as I see elderly neighbors get visited very seldom.
This decade has also cemented my view that relationships is what life is about. The good, the bad, it really colors the paiting that it is your life. Laughter and crying being the soundtrack of love lost and found.
I do consider myself a very sucessful person, and once again all due to those around me. This year had a lot of tough situations, but having the people I do around me made it possible to stay sane. I also learned that picking up the phone to call for help should not be just a last resort, but standard practice because perspective is what helps control the inner demons.
This decade I met some wonderful people and my quest for amazing friendships got richer and richer! I will someday win the lotto and get you all in one room at the same time. That would be an awesome dream come true.
My Mom’s advice through the difficult times has been very simple. Don’t ask for money or happiness, ask for health and peace. If you are healthy you can earn, if you have peace you will obtain happiness. She is soooo very right. I don’t end this year with overwhelming happiness and expectations like I have in the past, but rather with a (to borrow from a couple of people ) self satisfied smirk. Years are making me wiser, my support system every growing and fantastic and the journey still in its beginings.
So to those not with us anymore, I hope you are waiting for me to join you someday hopefully not any time soon. To those still with me, lets try to see each other more in the coming years! (YeY Travel).