Besides the pieces of our personality that are innate, we start to gather tons of things from people around us from the moment we are born. The models we use to shape who we are; were referred to as “espejos” (mirrors) by my Mom. Recently I’ve had the opportunity to speak with people that saw me grow up and it has really impacted me that who I am today is directly related to so many of the people that I grew up around when I was a kid.
Harry Potter has the mirror of Erised which materializes that which we desire the most. What if people were also like that mirrors, and when growing up those adults are the things we model ourselves after.
Human have many flaws, but when we are growing up many of the adults we see appear to have none. From our parents to our teachers none of them seem to have any issues and its only later in life that we start to see that there are humans behind those sturdy armors. Funny thing is that even as an adult I have met many people that really never lost their armor and did not end up looking as flawed as everyone is supposed to be.
Those people are the pillars of my life and who I have been able to model many of my personality traits after. I am positive by nature, but having people growing up that lived a life of positive thinking made that easier to develop. Seeing that people can live their life truly happy despite their circumstances is empowering. What also helps is to see how unhappy and empty is the life of someone that digs for a flaw on every person or every situation.
In recent years I have been able to curve my paranoid nature when it came to many aspects of my life, and it has been liberating to not feel like the other shoe is about to drop. Being in contact with some of those strong pillars in my life makes it easier to see that the life I chose to live is completely sane. Either that or I have found a nice group of crazy people… they are my little bee’s nonetheless.
Its rough to know that my strongest pillars is not with us anymore, and I miss him so much… however, he was a big mirror to me growing up and I hope I can be at least a little bit like him. I will continue to seek truth and good relationships like he always did.
I guess in the end we all get what we seek.