AXE Does Not Cut It

Believe it or not, I am a creature of habit. I have to try and be spontaneous, but I do like having some routines. I will try new things when I can, and sometimes love them, but sometimes things just go all wrong.

Bea and I don’t grocery shop together very often because my wife is a “gatherer” and I am a total hunting machine when it comes to going to the store. It was pretty rare that I went shopping with her not to long ago, and it was mostly to spend time with her and not so much the whole experience.

I am getting old, and I say this because one of my favorite deodorant and body was brands is old spice. Not sure why but I like how they smell. I am not totally brand loyal and if something is on sale and works, I go for it. Walking into the store that day and knowing one of the things I needed to buy was deodorant did not really seem like a big deal. Whatever is on sale is what my first choice would be. Well the whole trip turned into a lets change things up, and I ended up getting a different kind of razors and picking up the Axe sculpting hair creme and spray on deodorant.

At first I thought it was awesome, they both smelled great. That was a mistake, I remember my grandpa explaining deodorants to me when I was younger, he did work for a chemical plant that did a lot of toiletry type of stuff. He emphasized that when it came to deodorants I should not be fooled by the stuff that smells good, but go for the stuff that works.

The BFF and I have been working out consistently for a couple of weeks, but we started slowly. Our first workout that involved sweating profusely (and don’t get excited Chimpo, there was no actual physical contact) was our attempt at tennis. I played soccer a couple of autumns ago so I have gone into full sweat mode and had to drive with the “Eau du Logtar” in full effect in the past. Tennis was no joke though, I did not know I could actually smell that much, Axe does not do anything for you, it actually seems to be a B.O. enhancer.

So I said, well maybe what I did not use enough, nope, even after a reapplication of the stuff, if I sweat just a bit it freaking stinks more that is pleasant to me. I cannot see very well without glasses, I had to have bionic ears put in, heck even after the operation tasting food has been hit and miss… so smelling is my super power and dam that stuff just does not work.

Enter the freaking hair product. At first it annoyed me a little because for a product with sculpting in the name it made the little hair I have left fell just sticky not workable. The first couple of uses it has more of the cow lick effect than actually hair styling but whateves! as my wife would say. Then I started to notice that my scalp was getting dryer and dryer. Then a couple of days later, full snow storm… no need for fake snow in December, I think in a couple of days I could start decorating the X-mas tree.

I hate to be wasteful but I don’t think I will use very much of these products once I go back to the ones I know work very well. I guess I am going to have to use them for special events where I want to be stinky and so full of dandruff that someone might become truly become allergic.(ok you can fantasize now Chimpo.)

In more positive news, changing from overprized Mach 5 or 17 or whatever number of blades it is now, to the Sheik Cuatro was a good move. Its a lot cheaper and it works way better. Its nice to have actually purchased something that actually cuts as advertised.

6 comments on “AXE Does Not Cut It

  1. I once had a deodorant that smelled good but made me sweat and smell more+a giant far as hair-sculpting products I will omit all the hipster and grease references.get a hat and wear it backwards,that will take care of your hair problems and make you look like one of the people

  2. Poor guy… the good thing about such personal disasters is that excellent posts like like this one come out… B.O. and all.

  3. I never mess with the deodrant. Once I find what works, I stick with it. Wiley uses Old Spice – likes it, but the new scents messed around with the ingredients and ended up giving him a rash. So it’s classic for him.

  4. What you want is a good anti-perspirant. By definition, a deodorant just covers the smell. If the product is an anti-perspirant, it actually prevents you from sweating. This is why Degree works better than any spray on deodorant. Get something that makes keeps you dry first, then add your favorite cologne for the scent. That’s my 2 cents.

  5. This post made me laugh! My husband sometimes goes for what’s on sale and other times sticks with something he likes. Yet other times, he’ll try something new. But from watching the TV commercials, I think I’d die if he bought Axe deodorant. Everyone’s body chemistry is different, so it may work OK for him, but the commercials are so disgusting with “sweat” literally gushing from men’s pits, that on principal alone, I would hope he doesn’t try Axe! If he ever does, I’ll direct him to this post.

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