Failure to Communicate

Debate and dialogue while grossly different are seldom differentiated here in the US. I see dialogue as something productive and where both parties learn about a subject that they do not agree completely on. Debate is just trying to get a point across often to the attempt to destroy the other person’s decision. While I see how debate teams in high school might help form future lawyers, I think that dialogue should be a more important part. How often do we ask ourselves if we could see something redeemable in something that at first we find repugnant? Are we willing to listen to a counter point and not just find common ground but actually willing to see the other person’s point of view?

TKC can be one unpopular dude. It takes guts to be as visceral as he is at times. I have seen him cross the line into the personal quite a bit, but that is what satire is all about. When he has hurt those people that I call friends it makes me feel like I should defend them, but then I consider the source. Paying attention to what someone says online is like getting into a debate with a troll online. While TKC might not be a total troll and sometimes does have good intentions by trying to create exposure for others or a topic that he thinks need to be addressed, he sometimes spares no feelings. The problem with TKC is that he seldom participates in the discussion outside of his own blog, and I think by rule if you are going to “dis” someone’s blog openly, you should at least have comment in 10 posts. I am always thankful of the traffic that comes my way from him since he was one of the people that actually directed me to the local blogging community. However, it means more to me if he would actually participate here in some of the discussions and became a part of a community that reluctantly he trows water balloons at… I guess the fear of the people that got wet retaliating is a little too much.

Nick is one of my favorite commenters. He always tries to share his point of view and broadens whatever topic I post on. I am thankful for that participation even when I don’t fully agree.

He brought up the point that there is no real truth, or at least in the sense that I had tried to define it in the context of romantic relationships. I thought about it, and while I still believe that love is probably the only true, most important and universal feeling he does have a point. People often fail to communicate.

TKC is trying to say, he I acknowledge your community and why were the numbers so low in the last meetup? (the answer is it was impromptu and Spyder and others were on vacation most of the month so it was decided to wait until a later date to start planning the next big event. Also we have all formed friendships and get together in smaller groups all the time.) However, it comes out as a complete disregard and attack at one of our most respected members that has done nothing but try to keep a community of a wide variety of people and backgrounds together. So what we got here is failure to communicate. I could only wish that someday he would let me interview him not just as TKC but as the human being behind the satire blog.

10 Responses to Failure to Communicate

  1. TKC is OK, he does his shtick. I am surprised who thin-skinned some people are.

  2. Great post! You are so right in the difference between TKC & Nick. Nick has encouraged me to block & Tony just tries to piss me off. One is productive & the other not. Like I mentioned on Twitter I have no problem with the size of our Gatherings. The big ones are great in many ways. The smaller ones allow for longer conversations to happen & new friendships to form. At July’s Gathering I got to meet some bloggers and tweeters that I hadn’t met before. My whole purpose for the Gatherings is not to be the big dog & pee higher on the fence than anyone else. I’m interested in community. Through blogging/tweeting I’ve met some great friends. Many that I can see will be life long ones, like you & Bea. I’ve also found a new place to volunteer (@SNKC). I’ll never understand a person who is so negative. Life is too short & much more fun when you’re sharing with blogger/tweeter friends.

  3. Nice post. You are more than my token bro!

    I have a hard time differentiating the message from the messenger on TKC some times (not a problem limited to him tho). I get a lot of news from there, and a vast number of the bloggers I follow I first found thru a link on his site. When he writes about another blog, good or bad, people often follow his links. That’s good for the local blogger community. I met you because of TKC, so I guess I owe him that.

    In the end tho for me, it isn’t about who is writing but what they right. If TKC would link local bloggers that are NOT white yuppie scum I would read em. The fact that whitey doesn’t link to minority blogs isn’t surprising, as even Tony doesn’t give us a lot of choices (other than Alonzo).

  4. Let me start my saying something to Meesha: One thing is being thin skinned, and another one is expecting people to treat you with the same respect you treat them.

    While TKC likes to express his views and many people get easily offended, there are also times when he just crosses the line and nobody has to like it; in fact, he’s just plain disrespectful and it makes me angry. He’s so rude sometimes, I wonder what happened to the guy who is so eager to help when there is a good cause to fight for. I don’t understand this duality, this sense of community he seems to have, and yet he’s quick to nasty comments and making fun of the “white” blogger community.

    I haven’t been approached by a single blogger who comes from any minority, except for TKC. Where are they? Instead of bringing so much negativity into the blogosphere, why doesn’t TKC actually shows us where the minority bloggers are?

  5. It’s like going to a strip club and getting upset there are naked people there. You go to TKC – you know what’s coming,your choice.There are some minority bloggers like RDM or Ramsey Mohsen.

  6. See, this minority vs white people argument is one of the reasons why I took TKC off my blogroll and stopped reading him on a regular basis. I’m so effing tired of his spew in that regard, that I decided it wasn’t worth it anymore. I used to be one of his biggest cheerleaders, too. Not anymore! Even if he’s joking a lot of the time, it’s just ugly and gets boring to read when it’s said over and over and over.

    It bugs the shit outta me that he continually picks on our local blogging community the way he does, and yet he makes no effort at all to become a part of it by actually attending a meet-up. I personally don’t think that he contributes in any way to the group simply by posting links to our blogs now and then. That’s not enough.

  7. Right on, Logtar and Bea! I challenged Tony on his post to give us his list of top 10 minority bloggers. It will be interesting if he pulls through and posts some. I love new blogs I haven’t read before and I’m curious…

  8. I don’t consider myself a minority blogger, I am a blogger that happens to have been born in another country. I would love to read other blogs from people that were born in other countries, or that come from a minority background. I don’t consider Ramsey a minority blogger either. I do have a blog about Colombia but I have not updated it in a long time. http://colombia.logtar.com

  9. Logtar . . . Amazing post!!! All good stuff and the token comment wasn’t directed at you. Thanks for writing something so thoughtful, balanced and still challenging. That kind of insightful content doesn’t show up on my blog and never will. This blog is one of my faves and you’re right . . . It goes well beyond classification as a simply a “minority blog” and is just overall great writing.

  10. Thanks, Logtar, for the kind words.

    As for my comments here I try precisely because you try so hard; some blogs invite general mayhem, trolling or snark in their comments section, yours politely requests conversation. Or, as you put it, dialogue.

    As for lil’ Antonio, I’ll confine myself to noting she hasn’t had a page hit from me in well over a year and a half. She’s just a one-trick pony with a common (if sad) pathology.

    In any event, thanks again for the apprciation and keep up the good work.

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