Actually Upset

I am a very passionate person. Most people that don’t know me well think that something actually gets to me because I like to discuss things. The people that have been my friends for a while, or that have had a long term relationship with me actually know that it takes a lot to truly get me upset, and that is just something you just don’t want to see. Being let down by people a lot through the years, at first I thought it was unrealistic expectations about people, but I have come to the conclusion that some people never mature past the teenage years. Forever stuck at 16 is what I like to call it.

My closest friend emotionally is a blogger. Without him I think I would have crumbled into a world of self pity and desperation after the horrible relationship I was in before. Long distance we have been there for each other, and at times we feel a stronger connections that people that we see all the time. I know he has been the first phone call or e-mail when I have faced a real problem, he has also confided things in me that he had not even began processing. I have made connections with people online that are at times more meaningful than some in real life.

My favorite nurse and I have meet each other face to face, we have not really talked, but through online interactions I have started to consider us friends. While I don’t agree with some of the things she writes, specially the self flagellating ones because I hate seeing people in pain that they put themselves through, she has cracked me up, made me smile and today what she wrote actually made me upset.

While I do not fault the guy completely in this situation, and don’t believe that the way she is feeling is truly realistic… I know that for her it is real, and I know that there are guys like that… that never look at a woman who its overweight. I have asked myself if it has to do with how I grew up with both my Mom and Sister being gorgeous woman that were obsessed with their weights that kind of made me want to never put any pressure on someone because of their looks? Or is it that my favorite Aunt that always battled weight issues but was the sweetest person in the world? Is it facing weight problems as an adult? Is it my maturity? Is it the realization that I know that we are all going to get old and saggy some day and my love for someone would not end if they are fat, old, disfigured or sick?

I dated a fair share when I was younger. I did an international tour of sorts and dated woman of every race, shape and size. They were all attractive to me in some way, however, the more I personally date, the more I found that a mind is the sexiest thing about a woman. I know this only applies to me. I also know that some guys are just simply not attracted to overweight woman. However, the ones from the scooter joke are the ones that just upset me to no end.

You’ve hear the joke, “Fat chicks are like scooters, they are fun to ride until your friends see you riding one.”

If you are attracted to a woman that happens to be overweight (which by today’s ridiculous standards even Marilyn Monroe is a fat chick) you should be man enough to be with her. If you are man enough to put it in, you should also be man enough to take her out to dinner and have a relationship. If all you want is sex, then don’t ever tell her that what you are really attracted to is X or Y, because when you get it up it shows attraction. Grow up!

5 Responses to Actually Upset

  1. As a woman that has always struggled with my weight, I wish there were more guys out there like you. Fortunately, Ted is and realizes that he’d rather have someone that loves him and appreciates him than someone that simply weighs less.

  2. I’m a big guy (OK Huge, go look at the WLC6 page). I dunno if that is why I never judge by weight or not. So keep in mind that I may not be impartial. Also (except for gender differences) I have been in her place.

    Sizeism is the last universally accepted prejudice. Racists and homophobes need to keep it closer to the vest in general public, but it seems to be OK to go out with a “No Fat Chicks” T-shirt. It pisses me off, not for myself so much (I KNOW how big I am, and the threat to my life) but for people like GB, or my ex-roomie, or my cousin.

    I can talk all day about MY experiences but girls have it even harder. Any d-bag who can’t ride it in front of his friends (OK Maaaaaybe the analogy is breaking down a little) shouldn’t have bought/borrowed/stole the scooter in the fist place.

    Damn, I have already written more than I did on HER site. Fact is in my head I never think about GBs weight. Smart, funny, sassy, cool, great tits even but never weight.

    OK, I have typed more 3 times and it is almost incoherent rambling. GB is a tough girl and will get better. It’s not fair, but the worst of the hurt will go away.

  3. Hit another one on the head, sir. Women are obsessed by their physical appearance due to the distortion of beauty America has established. Marilyn Monroe was NOT fat. Sophia Loren is NOT fat. As far as I’m concerned women could emulate those celebrities because they were healthy. Regularly I am a size 14 and I love my curves. My husband loves my curves. Studies in other countries suggest women who have wider hips are considered better potential mates. It’s burned into our instinctual brains. Women are stronger than what they are given credit. However, the media would so well to show real women in commercials.

  4. I’m a fat chic – I’ve always been curvy but after kid #3 that went waay past curvy. Dan’s loved me then, loves me now and my weight doesn’t really affect that. I’m lucky – I wish more men who didn’t only seek out the body type presented in modern media.

  5. Instead of making excuses as to why people are the way they are, why doesn’t she just focus on losing the weight? She’ll feel better physically and emotionally and she’ll have to worry about less from society. I mean this with all due respect. Heaven knows I am a skinny white boy.

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