There is actually not a lot that can get my goat truly going unless I care about the person. I have no problem on calling my friend’s BS at all, and I don’t think any less of them because of views that might be opposite than mine. I actually have always admired the way you like to hear counter points to everything you discuss and enjoyed having conversations with you about those things.

My discussions with my friends lately have a lot to do with the current state of the economy and how so many people are simply finger pointing at this or that without really either investigating things or truly paying attention. We discussed a lot about knowledge and how sometimes knowing how the financial world really works and what going into it makes most people’s head spin, yet everyone now is an expert on economic policy.

Most of the people with strong opinions about the current state of things, media, pro athletes, and a couple of things I have read, are quick to point fingers but nobody every is introspective about what happened… did I help elect someone that changed a policy that later is hurting things? its funny to hear some of their points of view. That is what this post is mostly about and why I sometimes have to check my sanity when I read something written or said by Limbaugh or some other polarizing figure from either side. So I go back to my previous statement that some people are just a waste of time.

I have always felt that there is almost always something about friends that gets your goat but looking past those instances and taking the good they have to offer is what its all about. Hell! you have to call your friends on their bullsh!t from time to time but that doesnt mean I think lesser of them because they think something i dont.

I’ll admit, I am a nice guy totally out of self preservation. It’s usually easier to get by in society by being nice. Well, sometimes being an asshole pays, but I have to be really angry to make that work.

My biggest prejudice against others, is closed mindedness. My beliefs are fairly fluid, I am usually willing to consider other points of view, and adapt my own if warranted. To me, not at least accepting other positions is not just closed minded but wrong. And I’ll admit I am not always a good enough person to treat those folks nicely.

Being a good person is another issue, and let me say that while many of my friends will say I am one, I have a long way to go in my own opinion. That’s a discussion for later.

However, I did hear something from someone that funny enough is not even a friend anymore, but that person said that they were very selective with who they spent their time with. I believe this also to be important, and spending your time with people that are ignorant or are not contributing to you in any positive way can be a waste of your time.

Perfect example is when I went to see Chelsea Handler in Vegas, I considered that time a total waste.

And yes, I think that being nice simply because you want to, not because you expect something in return, is the right way to go, and I believe we don’t see much of it nowadays. That’s not to say it’s not out there; more, our culture feeds on dirty laundry. (It was a song, after all, so it must be true.) We don’t get in a tizzy when people are nice. We freak out when there’s a murderer on the loose, or when someone has bombed one of our embassies. When was the last time your neighbor called you up and said, “Did you hear what little Timmy did? He gave me a basket of flowers.” You’re more likely to get called when little Timmy blasts a classmate for being picked on.

Gandhi had it right: be the change you seek in your world.

I definetly look down upon some people’s opinions. To give you a couple, the person that believe that being overweight, even morbidly, is simply the result of laziness and don’t think any further than that… most of the time that leads to looking down at people. (I look down upon that.) Also to give you another example, the people that think that illegal immigrants are the scourge of this earth and are to be not just deported but shot if possible so they don’t cross the border again. (Even thought I don’t believe that it is right to come here illegally and believe that reform of the system and Mexico taking care of its own issues is in order.)

There is a saying that I grew up hearing all the time (Haz el bien sin mirar a quien) which translates to “Do good without looking at whom.” The closest I have ever heard here is, the golden rule “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.” I am not being a cultural snob here, since my culture is more of a mix than one or the other, but I believe that this society does good based on an “if” like you pointed out. Doing good without expecting something back is more along the lines of what I believe being truly good is all about. The concept of karma is one that I respect, but we often think too much of instant karma or what can I get…

This can lead you into another debate, Nature vs. Nurture. If <> was raised by a different family or in a different part of the world, would they have still turned into an evil person?

My ramblings: I think many people are nice because of the “What If”. What if there’s a Heaven and a Hell? If I’m “bad”, will I go to Hell for all eternity? What if I’m nice to that person? Will they help me when I need it? I think sometimes it’s about the fear of the unknown. Not necessarily altruistic, but human nature isn’t. And the definition of “good” and “bad” are in the eye of the beholder, aren’t they? Are you a bad person because you walk past that homeless man and decide not to give him any money? Does that make you heartless? Is somebody good because they decide not to have biological children and not adopt? Or does that make them bad because they don’t adopt? Edward, the vampire in Twilight is an interesting example (I just watched it so I have to put this in): he’s a vampire, which is bad because he sucks the lifeblood out of animals. But because he doesn’t do it to humans, then he’s good. And he cares for Bella, so that makes him good. Right?

It could be the cynic in me, but if you honestly ask this question, you will not get honest answers because people deep down want to believe that of course they are caring and nice (myself included – I’m not an alien here). They forget that time they were rude to the waiter (which is bad, right?) or the time they spanked the dog for pooping on the carpet, or when they yelled at their kid for no good reason other than they were tired, the kid was whiny, and they lost their cool for a second. But this again leads us back to everyone’s interpretation. The best thing you can do is treat people the way you want to be treated. It’s often forgotten, especially today, and yes, it’s easy to be ignorant and claim zero responsibility. It’s frustrating to see a problem and not be able to do anything about it. But people do learn, eventually. They just may have to go to jail, or bankrupt a company, or….to understand.