I Gave up smoking a couple of years ago. Once in a great while I will have a cigar, and when I am around constant smokers, my Mom, Bea’s uncles, I will puff on one. I started smoking when I was around 14, but my first cigarette taste came from my grandfather who would let me light one up for him. My first full cigarette came thanks to a nanny at age eight. I did not buy a full pack until I was a senior in high school and smoked pretty much throughout college. I quit for about 3 years from 2000 to 2003, and then picked it up until I was buying packs again. The worse that I ever got was during college when a pack would last me only a couple of days. 10 cigarettes in one day seemed like a lot, but I know some people can smoke two packs a day.
I quit cold turkey every time I gave cigarettes up. The physical addiction was not hard to overcome for me. It is a lot more noticeable when I give up caffeine than when I give up nicotine for sure. The psychological addiction is something entirely different because smoking was attached to other actions. Big meal, cigarette, stressful situation, cigarette, drink, cigarette. I did have a couple of things in my favor when quitting, I don’t like smoking inside my house or car, even thought I don’t mind if others do, and I also don’t like to take smoke breaks at work. I have the will power to give things up easily when I make the decision, however, with food it is another story.
I was a very picky eater when I was young. I was almost sick looking I was so skinny at times. During the first couple of years of my life my parents stayed at my grandma’s house. My grandma would never force me to eat, so I would not, but my Mom was worried about me so she made me eat and take vitamins. When we moved out she started to cook what I liked the most and took pretty good care of me growing up. I think she did too good of a job with food, and was probably always worried in the back of her head that I would stop eating again. I would also always finish up everything on my plate, and going back for seconds meant that I loved the food. Food equals comfort.
Now she worries about me quite a bit. Both of my grandfathers suffered from heart disease, one has had a triple bypass and a pacemaker and the other one is not with us anymore. At 30 I started taking cholesterol medicine. I also started to have more and more back problems and my knees are not in good shape either. My highest weight has been 270, I am not that tall. I think my ideal weight is 140, but I think I would look too skinny, so my goal is being under 200. I have over 50 pounds to go to reach that goal.
I am not afraid of exercise and love martial arts. Even practiced it 5 days a week for about 3 years. At my lowest going to the gym and doing crazy cardio I was 210. My problem has always been food, and I lie to myself saying that I don’t eat too much. I have been more conscious of my food choices lately and I have been surprised by how much food I can put away. Eating out is a big factor too, because portions are just crazy, and appetizers are just as bad as bottomless tortilla chips.
Obviously quitting food is not an option because we have not invented the food pill yet. Eating healthy is hard to do when you are addicted to cholesterol filled food, bread and pasta. Carbs and fried foods are so absolutely delicious that I don’t know how to quit them. I do have a couple of things going for me. I don’t care for sweets of any kind, and I do love fruits and vegetables.
I have raised my activity level quite a bit the last month. I have been less consistent with getting enough rest, but I am really trying. I have added vegetables to my diet, but I need to take more bad stuff out. I took Chinese completely out of the picture at least for 40 days. The key is finding good healthy choices and sticking to them. I don’t know if I can give up my addiction to bad foods, but I am sure trying to curve the trend towards better choices. It is just a matter of will power.