I would agree with you if Banky’s exercise was to make those changes in your attitude forever and not as an exercise.

Motivation is one of the hardest thing for some people to come by and I believe the exercise lets them try those clothes on to see what it feels like and the work towards achieving it.

A lot of what you are referring to seems to come from how others see people rather than how people see themselves internally.

I think what makes the exercise great is that it is all about a discovery face for some people that might be more introverted or lack stem. It is not a society norm on how to become a better you, like some of the other things I hear about in a constant basis… this is 3 simple things to try out and maybe affect your life in a positive way… I am surprised that you have seen so many flaws on it, which in my eyes are just social norms trying to be applied to how someone feels about themselves.

I have worked for workaholics before, and they thought 9-5 was a joke, they expected 50-60 hours a week, but would really only be satisfied if we put in 80+ hours… then we were working hard for them. Having a family to them was a negative that was never an excuse, because if they could put their family aside we could have too… so I do not go by others expectations if I believe they are in the end unrealistic and unhealthy.

I’ll continue part of the conversation here though.

First of all, well said Logtar.

Regarding more difficult to men. I’m failing to understand why being a 10 is more difficult based on gender.

Barry wrote:
“How is a guy supposed to do it if you aren’t close to a 10, and actually not come off looking kind of pathetic?”

Pathetic in who’s eyes? Not close in who’s eyes? You see, I’m one happy motherfucker. I’m involved with my family, my friends, and enjoy their company immensely. I have a plan for my life financially and professionally. I challenge myself on a daily basis to be better.

If you think Brad Pitt is a 10, and its all based on looks, I’m not in the same league. However, I’m not competing with him or anyone else. I can tell you unequivocally I take great care to look the best I can. And I know where I can do better. And if it becomes a priority to me, I’ll do it. If not, c’est la vie.

Do I fail once in a while. Totally. But, if you let it, all failure really becomes is fuel for some later success. So even my failures become part of what makes me a 10.

At the very least wear the first question for a while. If the idea of feeling like a 10 is uncomfortable to you, so much so that you can’t continue, ask yourself why? What can you do so that you would feel more comfortable trying that on?

If the answer is nothing and you still feel like a goof, put it down. This exercise aint for you personally.

But I would absolutely argue that men might even benefit more from this challenge than women. I feel a blog post coming on . . .

But that said – I think false self-confidence is still a bit delusional. Maybe it’s just me – if I feel I’m actually well-dressed, or doing a good job, or here for a purpose – I feel that already. But forcing myself to pretend I’m something I’m not isn’t helpful to me because it masks the faults in myself I need to be aware of. I know I’m sucking at work lately, but to go out there and tell myself (and others by body language and attitude) that I’m really doing a bang-up job is being dishonest to everyone.

If you look like a slob and do a lousy job at work, then admit that to yourself and try to improve. Then when you get to the point where your shoes really do shine and your boss is begging you to take his parking spot, then you can feel like a “10″ because you earned it.

For me, feeling like a 10 is feeling good about how am today, how my shirt is nice and ironed, how my shoes are shined, or my hair is clean and neat. Also how I am doing a good job and finishing stuff ahead of schedule at work. Its about feeling like God put you here with a purpose and you are doing everything you can to do it. Those are just some, but to me being a 10 is about me, not about making the “how yu duin?” face… gift to the world, not gift to woman.

I wanna say I am sorry I didn’t catch on that last week was so tough man. Usually when we talk you are trying o help ME out, and I don’t hear as much about your life. If you ever do need to bend an ear lemme know tho dude!

Looking forward to Saturday if we can pull it off!

Wow, interesting. I got sent here from Logtar’s recommendation, and I’m not sure I can any of the three, for a variety of reasons.

1) I don’t think it’s possible to view myself as a “10″. Especially being a guy. It just isn’t possible even to pretend that way. How is a guy supposed to do it if you aren’t close to a 10, and actually not come off looking kind of pathetic? For women it’s easy – eye contact with the guys, smile at them, be confident… With men if you try to do that and you’re not actually a 10 or close to it, you’re branded “that creepy guy over there…”

2) I would love to compliment people, and do when I can (take generous time to thank them for things they do for me) but again, to compliment someone out of the blue would brand me as some kind of weird creep trying to hit on someone.

3) I don’t really have any relatives I’m close to that I don’t see regularly anyway….

I’m curious what your answers were to your friend’s questions, now that she followed your instructions…