Is Happiness A Choice?

“Most people would rather be certain they’re miserable than risk being happy.”
Dr. Robert Anthony

There are harsh moments in life that sometimes overwhelm us to the point that we want to take a new direction. Some people call that hitting rock bottom. I believe that we all need to experience something of that nature before we are willing to institute change in our life. While it might not be as extreme for some people, it has to be something that shakes us enough to make us want to truly change, to move from talking about change to actually changing.

Risking Burro making fun of me for joining the happiness or positive cult, I believe that we all need to introduce positive thinking into our lives. The more I have tried to change my environment to have more positives, the better things have been. My thoughts have stopped going the wrong route more often than they used to.

I am a person that at times takes everything around me personally. While this is not something that I have completely been able to fix, it has improved tremendously. Most of it has to do with moving the life of control on my life closer to me. I do not let what others say, except for maybe what Burro says, make me change my self image as much as it used to. I now look at the people around me as people that might have other issues going on with them and simply trying to project something at the time they say something to me. I used to take a lot of things at face value, and I now let them sit for a little while before I let my brain think it is truly something about me.

I consider being happy being at peace with the world. Being at peace with the decisions you make, being at peace in the relationships you have. I wish I had been smarter about my feelings earlier in life because I would have not been as frustrated as I used to be sometimes. I remember that I thought that to achieve happiness I had to stop caring in some situations, but in reality is that I had to actually care enough to make decisions about those situations and being at peace with them.

Spending some time once a week looking at LOL Cats might not seem like it is a good therapy, but the laughter they produce have made it seem something I look forward to during the weekends. Spending a Saturday running around might not seem relaxing, but I got so much done this weekend that it felt a lot better than when I did nothing all day. Relaxing for me is not about quiet, but doing something that I enjoy to take a break from what my brain is busy with most of the week.

So what are you doing in your life to take a risk and be happy?

12 comments on “Is Happiness A Choice?

  1. I’m a firm believer that you can choose to be happy with what you have, or you can choose to be miserable.

    Just because I choose to be happy doesn’t mean I don’t have times I’m depressed. But it helps me recover a lot faster, that’s for sure.

  2. There are harsh moments in life that sometimes overwhelm us to the point that we want to take a new direction. Some people call that hitting rock bottom. I believe that we all need to experience something of that nature before we are willing to institute change in our life.

    Interesting thought. Especially after having read that enlightenment comes usually after a loss or big suffering. I don’t know why that is, but I suppose hardship puts things into perspective and makes you want to appreciate the good things.

    Implementing positive thinking seems to be easy, but there is a certain degree of effort in that. It is about changing old habits, structures and beliefs. Some of us get used to some things that turn out to be negative, and we simply don’t realize it.

    Fortunately one day we wake up and we discover that life can be lived in another manner. It is up to us to choose happiness, enlightenment or whatever we want to call that state of consciousness about ourselves and the world around us.

  3. Hehehe, I check that lolcats site everyday after I finish my bloghopping. It makes some of the meaner spirited things you read in a day seem to be no big deal.

    I also like Erin’s sisters site “What the Girls are Saying” for the same reason.

  4. That part in Bea’s comment about enlightenment often coming after loss — I can completely relate to that. I used to spend a lot of time with Greg… we talked every single day. When he passed away, I realized I needed to fill that time in some way, instead of feeling sorry for myself. So now I’m working on a second degree in the evenings… something very much in line with my career goals. And I’m working on making new friends. No one can ever replace Greg, but it’s still nice to create new friendships.

  5. I stay home with my son most of the day and work night shifts. I could have gone with the 9-5 Monday-to-Friday approach and farm the kid out to some daycare center, but I choose to romp around in the woods, climb jungle-gyms, and play in the sand instead. I don’t get many weekends off, but overall I get a lot more daylight hours with my toddler this way.

    As for the notion that people choose their own happiness or unhappiness, I quote Epictetus: “If, therefore, any be unhappy, let him remember that he is unhappy by reason of himself alone.” Also: “He is a wise man who does not grieve for the things which he has not, but rejoices for those which he has. “

  6. Oh, but Logtar: I just finished reading this book by him and it’s such and eye opener. Did you know philosophical stoicism can cure cancer? Or at least being all upset about having cancer?

  7. I’m a pretty positive person. I do try to create my own happiness, and not depend on others for it. Live is damn good living that way.

  8. Boy, have I missed reading you!

    Take a look around you. Think to news. What do they report? Bad things happening. Not good things, oh no, those aren’t exciting. Society as a whole, really, focuses on dirty laundry. (Can I quote the Eagles?) I was a negative nancy, and I still catch myself from time to time harping on the negative than embracing the positive. Our inner voices seem to do a lot to fuel the negativity until we actually pay attention and tell it to shut up.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *