“Find fault with thyself rather than with others.”
– Ieyasu Tokugawa
Admitting that we are wrong is probably one of the hardest things we have to do in life. At times it feels like we are compromising who we are by admitting that we are wrong, yet it is the only way to really learn and grow in life.
I am not sure where in life it starts, but we seem to develop a sense of guilt during our lifetime. I have seen it in different degrees and in different situations, but it is present in almost all of us. Some people call it arrogance, others just simply finger pointing, but I believe every time that someone tries to find fault outside of themselves, they are at fault themselves.
We are not in control of the world around us, but we are in control on how we react and interact with that world. We are responsible for our own happiness, and I think that every time that we point the finger at someone else we are taking control away from us and giving it to that other person.
Professionally I have seen this behavior more than I like to admit. I have gotten to the point before that I think becoming a mason and doing brick work would be a lot more rewarding, I would then not have to deal with the so called “professionals” that are there to take every single credit but when there is any kind of wrong they are the first ones to run or finger point.
We have all heard that we have to be part of the solution and not part of the problem, but no one tells us how to accomplish that. I think the first one is to do away with the notion of fault and replace it with accountability. It might sound like an oxymoron at first since to be accountable, first fault has to be determined but bare with me. If you always have ownership over your mistakes and hold yourself accountable it will always be easier to find solutions. Once you determine your stake on the situation you know what you can and cannot do to change it.
In the end it is a lot easier said than done, but believe me I think that a lot of what is going on in the world can be at times be blamed on people always blaming others for their situation. If we could all just take charge of our own lives instead of looking at others for excuses on how they are affecting us (not us letting us be affected by them), we could all be better at making our lives better and therefore a better world for all of us.