Total Recall

It is only fitting that if I ask questions I should first answer them. But I really wanted everyone’s opinion before I stated my view. (Go read my post Future if you have no clue of what I am talking about) I have been extra self-critical this whole year, partly because of the blog but also because my life has changed quite a bit. I love having a blog, it is an outlet that has enabled me to not only make new friends but also find things about myself that are very deep within me and yet come out so easily here. At the same time, this blog is only a little window into what I really am… I am way more annoying in person! My best friend can agree :)

Is it wrong to want more and have ambition?
To me misdirected ambition is the problem, or too much of it like anything else. Ambition for just money and power can lead to nothing but emptiness. I think self-actualization and wanting to better yourself and your life is a more realistic goal. I think if we become better versions of ourselves, or at least attempt it every single day we can better our standard of living quite a bit. Do I want more, sure I do, but I also stop to look at all that I have and thank God for everything.

Is it better to just look at what you have right now and enjoy it?
Have to admit this is a loaded question, very geared towards settling. I think that we should all count our blessings and thank God for all the favors. However, in appreciating what we have we should always want to improve, achieve goals and set new ones. Also living in the present is important, so I guess I am talking about a balance between living in the now and planning for the future. Along with all of this, I think we should never lose hope, once you have lost hope; existence is not quite the same.

Is it insane to be working every day and not having enough energy to enjoy God’s creation and just live?
I have to admit this I struggle with. A line in a movie (pop quiz, what movie)… What if I told you insane was working fifty hours a week in some office for fifty years at the end of which they tell you to piss off; ending up in some retirement village hoping to die before suffering the indignity of trying to make it to the toilet on time? Wouldn’t you consider that to be insane?

It is hard to find a purpose within your job sometimes, I love what I do but at the same time, should I be enjoying God’s creation more, should I be traveling and seeing the world. I guess I balance things out with things for the community and such. I will start the READ program soon at a local school helping children to learn how to read (not that I can read myself, LOL) and I also continue ASL class which is extremely rewarding to me, and I look forward to maybe some day soon being an ASL interpreter.

3 comments on “Total Recall

  1. Interesting questions. They’re something we all struggle with. In my mind it’s all about balance. Ambition must be balanced with enjoying what you have. Working hard must be balanced with actually seeing the world around you. If you go too far one way or the other, then you get out of balance and that’s when things seem go bad. It might be easier for me because I believe a job is just a means to an end. A tool to be able to do what I want for me and my future family. I’ve never been one that has “career” goals. Of course that also may mean I’m out of balance myself. :)

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