Even white lies in my book are wrong. I value honesty almost as high as respect, in fact I think that when you lie you are crossing the respect line. However, most people don’t work this way… for the longest time I had difficulty dealing with this. As a society, lies are almost an accepted for of communication under the cover of being polite.
Sure, it is accepted that if someone asks you how cute their baby is you say adorable… but how far does that go? However, you are safe bringing your kids around me, I will not go out of my way to tell them that Santa is not real. I will tell you if your kid is annoying, but you can bank on the fact that I don’t mind them being kids around me or in public.
Now that I have a daughter I get constantly bombarded with the, OMG SHE IS GORGEOUS! and I respond with my canned “I think so too but I am biased.” Is my kid cute? Most certainly, but not anymore than anyone else’s kid. I don’t value outward appearance over a lot of other qualities in a human being. I know this is not the norm in modern American society where everything is about how well (or bad) you look. Selfies are the latest expression of narcissism.
I don’t want little tyrant to start thinking that because people say positive things about her that it matter more than hard work or intelligence. I am sure she will eventually face someone that thinks she is ugly and I want her to have enough self assurance to know that their opinion is just that. It is a tough think to even consider but we live in a very cruel world.
I find interesting the whole notion of kids can be cruel, and I am inclined to think that it is more about kid having shitty parents. Kids learn words and behaviors from their parents. If you call your kid stupid, guess what, they are probably going to use those words on some other kids. Same with the word ugly and all down the line. I know unless I move to some utopia where everyone is nice my daughter will get called ugly some day and I am going to make sure she is prepared without being scared of what someone else’s opinion is. Again this is just me trying to figure this out, I bring no wisdom to this discussion and like always I leave with more questions than answers.